As the running of the 24th annual IRONMAN Lake Placid descended upon this small, sleepy little ski town, 11 HERD members hoped to etch their names in Ironman lore at this iconic location. But, as always, fate plays a sinister part in this IRONMAN as it does in every IRONMAN, lifting some dreams while crushing others. The day started out with impeccable weather and an electric atmosphere, with an added bonus for HERD race lovers both at the venue and those watching from afar: Who would win the race between El Presidente and Destroyer.
As Team HERD lined up for the swim start, chaos ensued, as Brewmeister ripped his zipper off his wetsuit with little more than 5 minutes remaining before entering the water. A shear look of disgust and fear crossed his face, but with the HERD mentality of take no prisoners, he entered the water with a defective wetsuit determined to not let it ruin his day. As the 11 participants made their way around the “calm” waters of Mirror Lake, the conditions could only be described as a blender, with elbows, feet, and bodies crashing into each other. Thankfully, all HERD members made it through the swim, realistically unscathed, which cannot be said for the bike course.
The elements did not disappoint, in what had been described repeatedly as a very aggressive hilly bike course. The first two HERD victims of the day were SP3 and King RED. After slogging through the first 50 miles and working their way back up the 1st 10 miles of the second lap, the skies opened up and unleashed a torrent of rain drowning the two weathered and batter competitors. SP3, with a look of conviction and certainty, was overheard saying, “I didn’t sign up for this shit,” as he and King RED hailed the SAG bus. King RED, who seemed perplexed at the elevation gain after just 1 loop of the bike course, said, “I had no idea how tough that bike course was. I wish someone would have told me that this course had hills. That thing chewed me up and spit me out. I deserve to go back to Big Red after that weak performance”. Meanwhile, the biggest drama of the day was unfolding at mile 100. Bryce, after smoking the first 100 miles, was overcome with nausea, lightheadedness, and just generally feeling like shit. But thanks to the efforts of Dustin and Shepherd, he dug deep, completed the bike course, and entered the run course. Paddy, on the other hand, was not so lucky. Having pushed exceptionally hard on the bike and looking to put up a great overall time, his nutrition management lagged behind his bike numbers and he paid the price. As he entered the changing tent, he realized that he was in trouble, but by that time it was too late.
Meanwhile, Ryno, El President, Destroyer, Hooch, Kona, Brewmeister, and, unbelievably, Cookies, Off The Couch, and Shepherd all were on the run course. Continuing his annihilation of all the courses that he takes on, Ryan just owned IMLP. Finishing 4th in his age group, Ryno, continues to prove he is the cream of the crop when it comes to finishing HERD Members. Not to be outdone, and with everything riding on the run, El Presidente and Destroyer put up a battle for the ages. Fueled by youth, and thoughtful training, Destroyer continued to live up to his nickname. While relatively close at the start, Destroyer put down a solid run, expanding his lead over the hilly and hot course to ensure victory over El Presidente. El Prez has nothing to be ashamed of, as his performance on this day was also equal to the task, and his 12th completed Full IRONMAN, continuing his streak of no DNF’s for the 140.6 distance, and to be on his way to Kona to compete in the mother of all IRONMAN races. Two surprising performances on the run were put in by first timer Hooch and, defending Athlete of the Year, Brewmeister. Competing in his first ever full distance race, Hooch navigated the run course, with the assistance of ~10 oranges, to complete what was a stellar first 140.6. Looking no worse for wear as he crossed the finish line, it is clear, that Hooch will only continue to carry on the HERD’s legacy in the Young Guns category. When asked if he was nervous starting out, he replied, “I get more nervous for golf tournaments than I am for this”. Then, living up to his name, promptly went and had a shot. Brewmeister consistently gnawed away at the miles, surpassing Destroyer on the home stretch, and then promptly entered the VIP tent where of course he had beers. After coming down from the euphoria of an epic finish, he then returned to his room where he spent the next several hours in the bathroom recovering.
With the final 4 HERD members on the course, fate reared its ugly head. Kona, our roving reporter from the race was giving updates via his iPhone, in the form of videos and messages. Never mind that iPhones are banned from the course; it was important for him to be able to get those great in shot race photos. True to his name, Kona continued to be the champion of the IRONMAN race. Crossing the finish line, Kona could be overheard asking if anyone wanted a shot of Fireball with him back in his room to celebrate, solidifying his position in defending the “We Party Hardest Than The Rest” award. As darkness began to fall, and the minutes ticking away, Off the Couch met his demise. After coaxing Cookies back into existence, and muscling his way to mile 13, his body shut down. After screaming at his legs, “The body can do amazing things”, Dustin made the difficult decision that all triathletes sometimes must make in that today was just not his day. However, he did log the 3rd longest DNF in HERD history, right behind Parkers 137.8 and his 139.7….valiant effort, and should be rewarded.
With time running out, and darkness falling on the finish line, perhaps one of the greatest all time finishes in HERD IRONMAN history was unfolding. Battered, bruised, and hurting Shepherd guided the younger Bochenek along the 26-mile course. Truly measuring up to his name, Shepherd did not leave the flock unattended and found a way to will Cookies to the finish line. The father/son tandem crossed the finish line under the cover of darkness with just minutes to spare, capping off what can only be considered another successful HERD event.
As the HERD members made their way home from IMLP, lots of questions remained. Will all those that bet on El Prez pay up? Will those that failed to cross the finish line give it another go at IMLP #redemption 2024? How quickly will SP3 have his bike listed on Facebook Marketplace and request that his name be moved over to the hall of fame side of the trailer? Will El Prez wait more than 48 hours before piling on Big RED? Whatever the answers are, as always it was a great time had by all and reminded everyone in attendance that the HERD is not just about racing, or trekking, or whatever you do out there - it’s about the guys and girls that make up the community that is the HERD.
TNN UPDATE
In the month that has passed since IRONMAN Lake Placid, several HERD members have decided that they are NOT FINISHED with this iconic course. Several HERD members, including King (Big) RED, El Presidente, Brewmeister, Hooch, Off the Couch, and Paddy Roo will be RETURNING to IMLP in 2024 for the 25th anniversary race. Joining these returning athletes will be the Mannimal, Chinstrap, Seven, and EnJenn, who will be competing in her first 140.6. In preparation for this demanding race, HERD members will be putting their training to the test at IRONMAN 70.3(4B) Boulder in early June, which is shaping up to be the HERD event of the year.
